Janice, Author at Gen3x - Page 12 of 16

September 3, 2013 By Janice

His and Her Shopping

Men and women can be very different, so it is important that we try to see each others point of view and to take the time to do what is pleasing for our spouse. For example, in general men don’t like to shop, but women usually do. If my husband needs a pair of shoes, he goes straight to the usual shoe shop, buys his shoes and comes home. On the other hand, I go to every shoe shop in town, spending the whole day browsing, then go back to the first shop and buy the pair I’d seen that morning.

So how can we possibly go shopping together without my husband getting fed up, or me ending up feeling rushed?

Each of us needs to give a little grace to the other. Consider one another and compromise.

going for a coffeee

Why not take time out and go for a coffee? Take every opportunity to spend quality time together.

This gives ‘him’ a break from the shops, and also gives ‘her’ a chance to ponder which shoes she likes best!

Communication is important, so it is good to make time to fit this into our busy lifestyles.

Remember it’s the little foxes that can spoil the vine!

Song of Solomon 2:15

Take us the foxes, the little foxes, that spoil the vines: for our vines have tender grapes.

Don’t allow the little things to build up and destroy your relationship.

May 10, 2013 By Janice

God Will Do A New Thing

BEAUTY FOR ASHES – HELP FOR A HURTING WIFE

Day 21 – God Will Do a New Thing

ISAIAH 43:18,19 – Forget the former things; do not dwell on the past. See, I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up; do you not perceive it? I am making a way in the desert and streams in the wasteland.

Don’t Dwell on Your Past

Unfortunately, not one of us can change our past, but we can do something about our future. God tells us in this promising verse, that we must forget the former things, and we are not to dwell on our past, but to look forward in anticipation because He is doing a new thing!

We can so easily become caught up in our past, and like I said in another study, we can become like a prisoner, bound in chains of emotional bondage, making it difficult to move forward. Jesus came to set the captive free, don’t be controlled by the things which He has already defeated at Calvary.

Jesus’ ways are always new and fresh, pure and perfect. The past is over and done, it’s time for you to concentrate and focus on what lies ahead. Jesus will heal your past and all the mental, physical and spiritual damage caused by that, while you press onwards into your future in Him.

He has something new in store for you

God has fresh spring water for you to drink which will sustain you, heal you and strengthen you. It is time (if you choose) to begin to reclaim what the enemy has stolen from you, your family and your marriage. Please be encouraged that God has promised you will be paid back all that has been taken and even double blessings for your loss and your pain.

“Return to your fortress, O prisoners of hope, even now I announce that I will restore twice as much to you.” Zechariah 9:12

“Instead of your shame you will receive a double portion, and instead of disgrace you will rejoice in your inheritance. And so you will inherit a double portion in your land, and everlasting joy will be yours.” Isaiah 61:7

So change your focus

In Day 1 we learned how God will give you beauty for ashes, the oil of joy for mourning, the garment of praise for the spirit of heaviness. It’s time to see transformation and new beginnings, so get ready for what He has planned for you.

You need to stop looking behind and start looking ahead. When you continually look behind you can’t see where you’re going! Have hope today that the God of the universe holds you in His hands and the enemy cannot snatch you away from them. It is only the enemy’s lies that will try to convince you that you must give up, or that God does not care.

Trust in Him and allow Him to be Lord over all your life and He will not fail you. We need to pray in agreement with our sisters around the world that many marriages will be taken back from the enemy’s hands as we turn our eyes towards Jesus.

“No one can deliver out of my hand. When I act, who can reverse it?” Isaiah 43:13

God is on your side, so you don’t need to be afraid. He sees your great pain, and He knows exactly what the devil has stolen from you. He will repay in His perfect way and His perfect timing. He promises you this as you walk in His ways.

“Blessed are all who fear the LORD, who walk in obedience to him. You will eat the fruit of your labour; blessings and prosperity will be yours.” Psalm 128:1-2

I know that change isn’t always easy

Sometimes we can even become comfortable in our troubles, because it is all we have known for a long time. You need to step out of your comfort zone with boldly confidence. God’s plans and His changes are always for your good. He sees the bigger picture and what lies ahead for you when all you can see is darkness.

At just the right time, He will show you this new thing He has for you and He will open your eyes to the way He is making in the desert.

Remember to praise and worship your Father in all things, who is the King of Kings and the Lord of Lords, you will be able to celebrate as the manifestation of this new thing in your life will appear.

So please take that huge step of faith, trust in Him and He WILL lead you into the promised land!

Beauty for Ashes

Gen3x – Help for women whose husbands are involved in pornography

May 8, 2013 By Janice

A Heavenly Benefits Package?

BEAUTY FOR ASHES – HELP FOR A HURTING WIFE

DAY 20 – Remember all His benefits

PSALM 103:2-5 – Praise the Lord, O my soul, and forget not all His benefits—who forgives all your sins and heals all your diseases, who redeems your life from the pit and crowns you with love and compassion, who satisfies your desires with good things so that your youth is renewed like the eagle’s.

What a wonderful scripture, packed full of fantastic benefits. God is a good God and He wants to pour out His blessings on you. He wants to see you live an abundant life full of health and happiness. Just like we would do anything for our children, our Abba Father wants to lavish us with “good things” too.

What are all the good things God has done for you?

As well as the ones listed in this verse, I try to remember ALL His benefits – this is the best way to bring yourself out of the sadness you may feel. Here are a few I have thought of, I’m sure you can think of many more.

He knit you together with love and perfection

God gave you life!

You are a beautiful woman who has been fearfully and wonderfully knit together in her mother’s womb. So, gift of life is the first benefit. All the senses that come with life are also benefits, we can see, hear, taste, smell, and feel so that we can enjoy all the beauty of creation which God has designed for us. These are the simple but essential things of life which we can take for granted.

We have air to breathe, clothes to wear, water to drink, food of all different colours, tastes and consistencies. Some we love, some we don’t, but others do! God could have made just bread and water for us to survive on, but He didn’t! He delights in us and so He made everything different and exciting, He is so creative. These are all benefits to remember and to thank God for.

The Greatest Benefit is Jesus Christ Himself

What other King would leave His throne to live a humble life on earth knowing He was going to be hated, mocked and tortured and then to forgive the very people who killed Him. He took those stripes on His back so we could be free from sickness, hurt and pain. He endured great pain and suffering on the cross so we could be forgiven of every sin, past, present and future. He even called it a joy to do this for us! He died and went to Hell to defeat death and to set the captives free. Finally, He rose again on the 3^rd day, victorious, and then ascended into Heaven and is now interceding to the Father on our behalf. He didn’t leave us alone though, because the same Spirit that raised Him from the dead is alive in us! Always remember that benefit – the same power that raised Christ from the dead is alive inside of us! Waow!

Focus on God’s Promises, Not Your Problems

As you continue to thank God for all these benefits, you are coming into agreement with Him and coming into line with the plans He has for you instead of feeling angry and bitter which falls right into the plans of the devil. The Bible tells us that God has extraordinary plans for our lives, so open up your heart and allow Him in. Put your faith and trust in God and His Word, and believe that what He says is true, even when your circumstances say otherwise. We have to try look beyond our problems and focus on the promises of God, knowing that He is always faithful and is committed to helping us. If your life is painting a negative picture, and when you’re tempted to grieve or complain, instead, put your faith in God and His promises. By doing this, you are looking with the eye of faith to the good outcome that God has planned for you.

Romans 8:28 And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.

When David wrote this psalm, He was aware that as he rejoiced in God, instead of fretting about His problems, He would be in high spirits. He knew that His praises would fight off the enemy and his attacks, and would instead bring the presence and power of God into his circumstances.

Psalm 8:2 Through the praise of children and infants you have established a stronghold against your enemies, to silence the foe and the avenger.

Each time you and I are in a trial, we need to choose between either focussing on our problems, or the Lord’s promises. What are you focussing on today? Make the right decision and choose the better and more victorious way!

A Heavenly Benefits Package?

I like to think of this Psalm as a heavenly benefits package! There is no other health policy on earth that could ever match this one and it doesn’t even cost you any money! What other benefits package can do the following:

1. Forgive you of your sins

2. Heal you of all your diseases

3. Redeem your life from destruction

4. Crown you with loving kindness and tender mercies

5. Satisfy your mouth with good things so that your youth is renewed like the eagle

This verse supplies everything that we need in life. If we were offered a package like this from some insurance salesman, we would give everything we had to have it. The good thing is it doesn’t cost us anything, however, it cost Jesus everything, He has paid it all!

Turn the Psalms into Your Own Personal Prayers

If you find it difficult to find the right words to pray, and I know from personal experience, that when in the midst of difficulty or trial, it is so hard to find words to pray, then go to the Psalms. God has already provided all the content of our prayers there, so we don’t have to work our how to put our words together. How thoughtful is that?

Our words, and especially God’s words, are powerful tools. As you say them out loud, they make their way inside of you and become engrafted into your heart. You might not feel like praising God, but it’s good to speak words of praise even when you don’t feel like it. It’s good to exhort your soul to praise God. As you do, you begin to stop dwelling on yourself and your emotions and you will start looking at God instead.

Beauty for Ashes

Gen3x – Help for women whose husbands are involved in pornography

May 1, 2013 By Janice

Do Not Take Revenge

BEAUTY FOR ASHES – HELP FOR A HURTING WIFE

DAY 17 – Don’t Take Revenge, Give it to God

ROMANS 12:19 – Do not take revenge, my dear friends, but leave room for God’s wrath, for it is written: “It is mine to avenge; I will repay”, says the Lord.

Revenge is a Natural Instinct

It ‘s easy to want to seek revenge on our husbands when they hurt us. We want to take things into our own hands and get even. It’s a natural instinct. I was very angry that my husband seemed so happy when meantime, I was full of hurt and pain. Consequently, resentment and bitterness began to well up inside of me and I wanted him to pay. I became depressed and run down. It was only as I began to focus on what God wanted me to do, and ask for His supernatural strength to help me, that I was able to let go. I no longer wished vengeance on my husband, instead I wanted to see him blessed. Vengeance is God’s, He knows your struggles. He will take care of those who do us harm or who do Him harm. You are His little girl, and He does not want to see you hurt or mistreated, He loves you too much.

Revenge is a Sign of Unforgiveness

When we seek revenge, it is an obvious sign we have unforgiveness in our hearts. Learning how to forgive others is one of the most unnatural things to do and goes against our human nature. Forgiving is a supernatural act that Jesus Christ was always capable of, He forgave tax collectors and prostitutes, and forgave his best friend Peter, for betraying him. Even on the cross, he forgave the people who killed him.

When we are hurt by someone, we want to hold a grudge and we want justice. Praise God, when we learn to forgive our husbands, and allow God to take all our burdens and to take control of all our circumstances, we will no longer feel the need for retaliation.

You Need to Know Your Identity in Christ

When we seek the approval of others, especially those closest to us, we get hurt if they reject us, or sin against us, By taking our eyes off God and who we are in Him and putting them on the conditional acceptance of our husbands, we set ourselves up to be hurt. We forget that other people are not capable of unconditional love.

Our self-esteem can be feeble and fragile, especially when we have been wounded and hurt. All it takes is for our husbands to disapprove of something we’ve done, or even us thinking he disapproves, and it knocks us off our feet. These attacks bother us because we forget who we really are. Don’t allow the devil to intimidate you or to take away your identity or your life.

We Shouldn’t Gloat When Bad Things Happen to Those Who Hurt Us

We shouldn’t be happy If something bad happens to our husbands. I remember at times if my husband had done something to hurt me in the past, and then afterwards maybe he banged his thumb with the hammer for example, I would think ” Ha ha, he deserved that!” but Proverbs 24:17-18 says “Do not gloat when your enemy falls; when he stumbles, do not let your heart rejoice, or the Lord will see and disapprove and turn his wrath away from him.” We are told to pray blessings on those who hurt us. We are to show kindness and love. We are not to wish punishment for their injustice against us. Offences will come, not only from our own husbands, but also from others, even other believers. Unfortunately, we live in an ungodly world.

At the cross, our sweet and precious Saviour, the spotless lamb, was “wounded for our offences.” He did no wrong, yet He took them all on His body, on the tree, so that we could be free from offence, shame, guilt and so much more. He has already won the victory for us. We just need to rest in Him and trust Him to sort everything out for us.

You Are a Princess!

As believers, we are forgiven daughters of God. He lovingly chose us and adopted us into His royal family as princesses! Our true worth comes from our relationship to Him, not from our appearance, what we do or say or even who our husbands say we are.

When we remember that truth, it makes it so much easier to fight off those fiery darts of criticism and negative words which the devil will throw at us through others.

No one Knows the Human Heart Like Jesus.

Jesus knows what’s in your heart better than you know yourself, He knows, too, what’s in your husband’s heart. He knows the reason we do some of the things we do. He knows every stronghold, and every weakness. He knows every kind thought, but also every ungodly thought. The good news is that He came to set the captives free through His death on the cross. Allow Jesus to fix your broken heart and also release your husband to Him and allow Him to do what needs to be done, He is the only one who knows exactly what’s going on inside.

Revenge should be left in God’s hands. Proverbs 20:22 also talks about revenge, “Do not say, I’ll pay you back for this wrong!’ Wait for the Lord, and He will deliver you.”

It may seem just too hard to hand it all over, but with the supernatural help of the Holy Spirit, all things are possible.

What Should You Do with Injustice Then?

The first and most important thing we should do when we feel we have been wronged, is to go into God’s court of justice, to commit your case to Christ, Who is your Advocate and your Counsellor – the best One you could ever have! He will make room for whatever has happened to pass by and escape so that negative feelings will not gain a stronghold on your mind, such as self-pity, unforgiveness, anger, bitterness or revenge. He will avenge you of your adversary, and will compensate your wrong.

Rest calmly on His breast amongst all the criticisms, accusations or cruel words which may come your way. He is your shelter and He is your fortress and He loves you like no-one else. He has promised to keep you safe from all those things the world will throw at you, from the words which may be spoken over you:

“Oh, how great is Your goodness, what You have laid up for those who fear You, which You have wrought for those who trust in You before the sons of men! You shall hide them in the secret of Your presence from the pride of man–You shall keep them secretly in a pavilion from the strife of tongues. Blessed be the Lord for He has showed me His marvellous kindness in a strong city.” Psalm 31:19-21

Janice – Beauty for Ashes

Helping wives of men who are involved in sexual sin Gen3x

April 29, 2013 By Janice

Hand it all Over to God, He Will Act

BEAUTY FOR ASHES – HELP FOR A HURTING WIFE

DAY 19 – Hand It all Over to God, He Will Act

PSALM 37:5 – Commit your way to the LORD; trust in Him, and He will act.

As I studied each of my favourite scriptures closely, I realised that any verse containing a promise, mostly always contained a condition for God bringing that promise to pass and this one is no exception. It is a tiny verse with two conditions, which if met, set a great promise in motion.

Commit Your Way to the Lord

The first condition is to “commit” your way unto the Lord.

This means we need to totally yield, give up, or totally surrender. We need to give God complete control of everything, including our husbands, our children, our marriage and all our circumstances. No matter whether things are good or if things are bad, God wants all of us. We can’t say today we’re in and tomorrow we’re out, depending on how we feel. We need to fully trust Him all the time and say, “God you know what is best for me, my husband and my marriage, please have your way.”

You Can Always Trust God

The second condition is that we must trust Him.

We can commit to a lot of things but never really have trust. Many people make a commitment to marriage but when your spouse betrays you, you can lose your trust for him and he needs to earn that trust once more. It’s not like that with God. He wants us to trust in Him, He is the only One who will never, ever fail us. We should trust in His word and in His Son. He has our best interests at heart. Remember God sees the bigger picture and knows all that is happening. God created you. He loves you with a perfect love. He will work out everything for your good and for His glory.

Be Patient and He Will Act!

It is after we have committed to Him and have placed all our trust in Him, that we will see God act in our lives. Maybe not straight away, or all at once, but He has promised that if we commit and trust, HE WILL ACT, and God does not break His promises. Unfortunately, we can get frustrated, or even mad at God, because things aren’t working out the way we want them to or there seems to be nothing happening at all. This is not what the Lord wants for us. He wants us to focus on Him, and as we do, He will act, and He will begin a wonderful transformation in our husbands and our marriages. When we live our lives this way, He will make our burdens light and we will have the peace, joy and satisfaction that all of us desperately need and desire.

He Will Carry You Through

Don’t allow doubts or fears to cause you to turn from God. This means that instead of trying to do what you think is right in your own power, look to God not only for guidance but also for the strength and the will power to do what pleases and honours Him. This calls for constant prayer, where we repeatedly ask God for grace to guide, strengthen, and protect us.

I commit my way to You Lord, I trust in You and I know You will act in my husband, my marriage and my circumstances.

When dangers and conflicts arise, quote this little verse to yourself, remember the promise it contains and He will carry you through any struggles in life. He has the power to move heaven and earth on our behalf. He has guided me safely through countless dangers, and has never failed to protect me from harm and He will do the same for you.

Would You Marry Your Husband All Over Again?

During the first 15 years of my marriage, and at my most unhappy moments, if someone had asked would I marry my husband all over again, I probably would have hesitated in my answer. My mood would change from high to low, mostly low, depending on how our relationship was going at the time. I realise now that my joy was in my husband and how he treated me, not in my Abba Father. God brought us together for a reason. God has carried us through many trials and heartaches, and He has a greater vision of His plan and I only have a little piece of it. God has been intimately involved in my life right from the time I was in my mother’s womb until now and cares very much about what happens to me. He has great plans for me and my husband. It may be different plans or desires or dreams than I ever thought I wanted but His plans are more extraordinary than any I could ever imagine. He has great plans for you too, and far more than you could ever imagine possible, so allow Him to have His way in your marriage.

Now to Him who is able to do far more abundantly beyond all that we ask or think, according to the power that works within us, to Him be the glory in the church and in Christ Jesus to all generations forever and ever. Amen. Ephesians 3:20-21.

You don’t have to understand completely how God works all His ways, all you have to do today is wait patiently, commit to Him, trust in Him and He will act!

Janice – Beauty for Ashes

Gen3x – Helping woman whose husbands are involved in pornography